The traditional wedding anniversary gifts by year start with paper for the first year and move to sturdier, more precious materials as the marriage gets older: wood at five, tin at ten, silver at twenty-five, ruby at forty, gold at fifty and diamond at sixty. The idea is simple. A new marriage is light as paper; a long one is as lasting as a precious stone.
There is no single official list, though. The one most people use in Britain and America grew out of older customs and was expanded in the twentieth century, partly by jewellers and retailers in the United States, which is why the early years often differ between sources. Where the British and American traditions disagree, we give both. The Wikipedia article on wedding anniversaries lists the main variants side by side.
The first ten years
- 1st anniversary: paper. Some British lists put cotton first and paper second. Paper stands for a marriage that is new and still being written on. Gift thought: a letter, a book, tickets. More in our guide to a paper anniversary gift.
- 2nd anniversary: cotton. Everyday comfort, the routines you have built. Gift thought: good bedding or a soft blanket.
- 3rd anniversary: leather. Tough, and it gets better with use. Gift thought: a belt, a bag, a leather-bound notebook.
- 4th anniversary: fruit and flowers in the traditional American list; linen or silk in British ones. Gift thought: a fruit tree for the garden, or linen for the table.
- 5th anniversary: wood. The first big milestone, a marriage that has put down roots. Gift thought: something carved or made of wood, or a tree you plant together.
- 6th anniversary: iron (American) or sugar (British). Gift thought: a cast-iron pan, or an afternoon at your favourite bakery.
- 7th anniversary: wool or copper. Gift thought: a wool scarf for winter walks, a copper pan.
- 8th anniversary: bronze (some British lists add salt). Gift thought: a small bronze piece, or a good salt and pepper set for the kitchen.
- 9th anniversary: pottery (older British lists give copper). Gift thought: a pottery class for two.
- 10th anniversary: tin or aluminium. The first round decade. Gift thought: something tin, or a look back at the first ten years together.
Years eleven to twenty
- 11th anniversary: steel. For a marriage that can take a knock.
- 12th anniversary: silk (British lists often say silk and fine linen).
- 13th anniversary: lace.
- 14th anniversary: ivory. These days nobody gives real ivory: think ivory-coloured instead.
- 15th anniversary: crystal. Clear and transparent, like two people who know each other well. Gift thought: good glasses for a special evening.
- 20th anniversary: china. Fine, but fired hard. Gift thought: a proper tea set, or one beautiful cup.
The big milestones
- 25th anniversary: silver. The first great celebration, often with family. Gift thought: something silver, or a look back over twenty-five years.
- 30th anniversary: pearl. One pearl for every year on the string.
- 35th anniversary: coral (jade in some modern lists).
- 40th anniversary: ruby. Red for a love that still burns after forty years.
- 45th anniversary: sapphire.
- 50th anniversary: gold. The anniversary the whole family celebrates. Ideas in our guide to a golden wedding anniversary gift.
- 55th anniversary: emerald.
- 60th anniversary: diamond. Diamonds are the hardest stone there is.
The rare ones
- 65th anniversary: blue sapphire.
- 70th anniversary: platinum.
- 75th anniversary: diamond and gold. Some lists give diamond again, some gold.
How the German list is different
Germany and Austria have their own names, and they differ more than you might expect. The tenth anniversary is the Rosenhochzeit (rose wedding), twelve and a half years is the Petersilienhochzeit (parsley wedding), thirty-five is linen, and there are even half anniversaries at six and a half, thirty-seven and a half and sixty-seven and a half years. Seventy years is the Gnadenhochzeit, the "wedding of grace". If you are buying for a German-speaking couple, our German list of Hochzeitstage has every name.
A gift that works for any year
The materials are a nice hook, but nobody minds if you skip them. What works for every anniversary is a gift that looks back at the two of you: how you met, what you came through, what you are like together now. A letter does that, and so does a photo album.
Our How We Met book is that kind of look back. You answer questions about your story, it is written as a letter from you to your partner, and every page is painted in watercolour from your photos. For the first anniversary it fits the tradition exactly, because a book is paper. For every one after that it fits because the story gets longer. If you would rather write something yourself, start with these questions to ask your partner about how you met, and if it is February you are planning for, here is a sentimental Valentine's gift.
Buying for your parents' big anniversary instead? The book they would want from you is usually about one of their lives: see a golden wedding anniversary gift.
Frequently asked questions
What are the traditional anniversary gifts by year?
Paper (1), cotton (2), leather (3), fruit and flowers or linen (4), wood (5), iron or sugar (6), wool or copper (7), bronze (8), pottery (9), tin (10), then crystal (15), china (20), silver (25), pearl (30), ruby (40), gold (50) and diamond (60). The early years vary between lists.
Is there an official list of anniversary gifts?
No. The lists come from custom, and the modern American one was expanded by retailers in the twentieth century. British, American and German lists agree on paper, silver, ruby, gold and diamond, and differ on many of the years in between.
What is the traditional first anniversary gift?
Paper in most lists, which makes a book, a letter or anything printed a natural choice. Some British lists put cotton first and paper second.
Which anniversaries are the most important?
The ones most people mark with a party are the 25th (silver), 40th (ruby), 50th (gold) and 60th (diamond). The first anniversary is more often just for the two of you.
